A former lecturer in Zambia has been refusing to have sex with his wife, another lecturer, since October last year because she refuses to cook him his traditional foods. Douglas Hampande, now a senior officer at the National Aids Council says his wife Mundia Mushokwe was not performing her duties. Mushokwe has sued him for divorce.
According to the divorce papers filed at Lusaka Boma Local Court, the pair have two children.
In her testimony before Senior Presiding Magistrate Elipher Mwewa who was sitting with Senior Court Magistrate Abyshine Michelo, Mushokwe, a lecturer at Evelyn Hone College said she couldn’t continue in a marriage where the head of the house believed the union was a mistake and a source of his spiritual problems. The emotional Mushokwe also complained that she no longer has a say in the marriage and added that Hampande has been accusing her of mistreating his relatives.
Mushokwe further complained that Hampande had been starving her of her conjugal rights since late last year.
“He comes home late every night and the last time we had sex was October last year. Two weeks ago, we were in court seeking reconciliation but to no avail. I can’t take this no more,” said Mushokwe, in between sobs.
But Hampande, a well known media personality who has not only written for a number of media outlets but also lectured journalism students at among other institutions Evelyn Hone College said his wife’s behaviour left much to be desired.
He accused his wife of being arrogant and irresponsible adding that she ill-treats his relatives. The slender looking Hampande also claimed that he’s lost a considerable amount of body weight because of Mushokwe’s bad attitude towards his relatives.
When asked by the court why he’s been refusing to perform his ‘bedroom roles’ since October 2011, as claimed by Mushokwe, Hampande responded: “ I am a very energetic Tonga man who enjoys sex so much but I have deprived myself because of my emotions… I do this as a counter reaction to my wife’s attitude….. She doesn’t cook traditional foods for me. My Tonga maid taught her how to prepare Chibwantu for me but she does not do it. I love Chibwantu so much,” said Hampende as the court audience burst into laughter.
The Chibwantu Hampande was refereeing to is a well known delicacy among the Tonga people and other tribes alike.
And Hampande clarified that problems in their marriage were not because of another woman he was seeing. He insisted that their differences were internal. And Hampande did not object to the divorce application by his wife saying their marriage wasn’t meant to be.
Passing ruling on the matter, the court observed that it was sad that the two respected members of the society were washing their dirty linen in public. But the court did not hesitate to dissolve their marriage saying this was because both of them had made up their minds over the issue.